On This Day In History...

My grandma died...

Today marks two years that we have been living our lives without her.

I've only said a few things about my grandma on here, but she really was the most amazing person in the world. At least to my family and to anyone who met her.  She died from pancreatic cancer that she had only been fighting for barely over a year. It's hard to believe that I get up and live every day of my life without her in it.

She was the person I went to for everything.  Sometimes, even though it has been two years, I find myself dialing her phone number when I need someone to talk to or something to cheer me up. Not a day goes by that I don't think of her...

We got the news that she only had about 6 months to live during the summer before my senior year. I had just made the drill team and she was so proud of me. There was nothing she wanted more than to see me on that team...She only saw me dance with them one time at camp during the summer. She didn't see me graduate or join the Marines. She didn't get to be there when J popped the question and she won't be at my wedding...But I guess I'll just have to keep on living...

The worst part? She died on my cousin's birthday...This year, instead of making it a sad day, we decided to get together and have a party for him. Today he turned 15.  

He got a bunch of cool presents and I made him his favorite dinner. 

Better to have too much than not enough right? There's 31 enchiladas there...But they were delicious and worth every second it took to make them. And everyone loved them. I love to cook for a crowd that's not picky.

After all the food, cake, and icecream, we proceeded to play a game. 

My grandma loved games and she passed that love onto us by playing them with us all the time. Every time we get together for a dinner, which is quite often because we all live very close, we play a game. Tonight we picked 

Unfortunately, it turns from fun to ruthless very quickly.  It's impossible to win this game playing with our crazy bunch...

All in all, today was a really tough day.  I'm reminded of what I had to go through right before my senior year started and the fact that I have to grow up with out my grandma.  I hope that this day gets easier.

Why They Be Hatin'?

Today, I thought maybe I would take a look at some website where women talk about how they made their military wedding work. I've been thinking a lot about what J and I are going to do and I thought maybe I would try to see if there were other people in my situation.

To see it first-hand you can go to http://military.weddings.com/ and click on the "Military Wedding Board" on the right hand side.

Of course, I found several a million posts on a website by Theknot.com where women just tear into other women about their problems and situations. I cannot believe it. I mean, yeah, I understand that some people can be very naive about the situation and some of them are just straight up stupid, but what gives you (you being these women that are just destroying these women and probably making them cry) the right to say what they should and shouldn't do?

Yes, I know that these women have already gone through the process of getting married to a man in the military and should have some gem of advice that they can give to people like me that are just lost. But I just don't understand why they are doing it the way that they are.  The sad thing is, it's not just one or two women that are doing this. It's most of them!

For example, I read a post by a girl that said that the distance between she and her now husband has really been upsetting for her lately and she was asking the wedding board people how they cope with the longing. Instead of giving her advice on how they cope with it, almost every person that had a response was criticizing her and telling her that she needed to toughen up and learn to deal with it. It makes me so mad to read.

The whole point of her posting that on the site was to get help with dealing with her problem and instead of giving her advice that would help, they just made her feel like shit for having feelings and missing her husband.  I just can't believe it.  It's like they think that everyone is in the exact same situation as they are, so why can't the just do it the way the did? Wow, I am so glad that I have an awesome bunch of blogs to read when I need support or other bloggy spouses to reach out to. If I had to go message boards like that all the time, I would probably just decide that I don't even deserve to get married because I'm too poor/dumb/not cool enough. Whatever.

What gets me, is they are women that are on a Military Weddings website that have been married for who knows how long that spend all the their time tearing down other women who just want help. Don't they have anything better to do?

How rude...