Bigger Than You & Me

Although I have always been appreciative of the Armed Forces, it means something completely different to me now. I believe I said something to the same effect last memorial day, but even since then my views have changed.

Ever since the first day of basic when I put on that uniform and looked in the mirror, I felt completely different about the military.

I always knew it was hard work, but until you live it, it's impossible to understand.

I work 16 hour days. Sometimes Longer.
I have been away from home for nearly 6 months. I'm missing the first months of my nieces life...

I wake up at 04 every day. On the weekends, I think I get to sleep in because I don't wake up until 05.
I eat in a cafeteria every day. The same old food every day every meal.
And I can eat it in ten minutes. No matter what it is or how it tastes.
I have to work out every weekday. It doesn't matter if I don't really feel good, if it's raining, if it's
cold, if it's hot...I'm out there getting it done. Plus, this vest is torture.

All these friends I'm making? We're all about to get spread out all over the world.
I live my life checking my watch just to make sure I'm not late for something.
I sustain relationships through the phone, letters, and internet.

I am constantly challenged in ways I never would be otherwise...
I have to wear my hair slicked back in a bun every day... (that's seems stupid, but it's the principle.)
If my bed isn't made in the morning, I can get a counseling statement that goes on my record!
I lose sleep every other night pulling fireguard.
I spend more time in formation than I do doing anything else.

My feet and legs constantly hurt and I am always wishing I was somewhere else.

But, with all this being said...I couldn't be any more proud to be serving in the military. I make sacrifices for my country every day, and I'm not even over seas! Imagine the types of sacrifices all of those who
are deployed are making as I type out this post.

This Memorial day weekend has been really great for me. Yesterday I hit the mini-golf course and spent some time with some friends that are leaving me this week for their duty stations and their homes...I had the day off and got to spend it out and about on post. I went bowling, enjoyed some real food, and went swimming. I couldn't have asked for a better day...I hope that today you took a moment to appreciate what you have because of the brave men and women who have fought for it.

They deserve at least that...they're all working for something so much bigger than you and me...

TGIFF

Last Memorial day weekend my family was out of town and I was chillaxing at home. They were all at a music thing, but I had to work and I couldn't go.  It was the same weekend that J broke up with me for the first time.

One whole year ago.

That is so crazy. I am having a hard time wrapping my head around that one. Time passes by so fast I can hardly catch my breath.

But today, I am in, yet again, an entirely different place doing completely different things look forward to a whole new life.

It's funny how much the military makes you appreciate all the little things. Sure, at home when it was Friday I was happy. I rarely worked on Saturdays and I usually got to go out and party that night. I always had good Fridays. But here? Here it's completely different.

I wouldn't say that I live for the weekend, because the days truly aren't all that bad, but the military just brings a whole new appreciation to the phrase "TGIF" And now, that's not a typo in the title up there. I am saying "Thank Goodness It's Freaking Friday."  But the things I look forward to on the weekends here are so different from those that I looked forward to at home.

At home, I wanted to go out with my friends, maybe see a movie with my family, do some shopping, stay up late just because I didn't have to wake up here.

Here? I look forward to walking to the PX, drinking a redbull, eating some Chinese food or some pizza (that's pretty much all they have there...) maybe buying a movie, sleeping, wearing an outfit that I picked out for myself and not one that was put out by my platoon sergeant, and going to the library.

It's just so hard to do all these simple things here it's so nice to come upon a weekend and be able to wear a tee shirt and jeans...It makes you so grateful for all the things that you have in the civilian world.


I am so excited to have an awesome Memorial day weekend! Yay for 3 day weekends!

It's Kinda funny...

Alright bliggity blog world...hold onto your keyboards, iPhones, Galaxy S3s, iPads, etc...this is about to get real.

I have been debating back and forth about whether or not to share this little bit of info with the blog world, and I've decided that since almost everything else about this situation was on here, this may as well be too...

I have become friends with J. Real. True. Sincere. Talk as often as we can. F R I E N D S.

I suppose this started right after I got finished with basic. I sent him a message on Facebook (I'm pretty sure I said something to him first, but I can't remember) just briefly summarizing some of the highlights of basic training (sharpshooter, high PFT, got promoted etc.) And then I left it alone. In all honesty, I was a little bit upset because I wrote a letter to his home address that didn't get forwarded to him...it got sent back to me. I was kind of miffed even though he had no part in it, so I wasn't really interested in a conversation...

Well,  day or so later, he responded to my message and shocked me. I didn't expect him to say anything while he was on deployment. Oh yeah, he's deployed BTW...So anyway, as I was saying, We had a good little chat. I figured it would end at that. And it did for a while. But then he started talking to me more often. Then, it was, like, every day, like clockwork, even.  It took me by surprise, but I didn't see it as a bad thing at all, and I still don't.

Honestly, we're really good friends. It probably helps that he's on the the other side of the world living a completely different life than I am, but whatever. What matters, is that I'm...happy. I'm okay with my situation. I'm homesick, but I'm okay.  It doesn't make me sad or especially nostalgic to talk to him. I can be...adult about it and not have a problem.

Now that is something else if you ask me...

A Year Older...

Well, on Tuesday I turned 20 years old!

I am a year older. A year wiser.

A whole lot has changed since my last birthday. I'm in a much different place than I planned, but I'm okay with it.

I didn't spend my birthday out on the town. I didn't spend it with my family or my friends, but I did spend it working. Living my dream, doing my best to be okay with being away from home on my birthday for the first time ever.

I got a package from my Aunts today that I am very excited about! I used that towel after my shower today. It actually dried my body. It's funny how much you appreciate those simple little things when you're without for even a short period of time. I also enjoyed my favorite snacks for the first time in so long. I needed the Cheez-It Duoz and Sunflower seeds. They changed my life. 

I also decided to spoil myself a little bit with a pair of Oakley Sunglasses. I've been wanting a pair for a while but I couldn't talk myself into buying them. Well, I decided that I could buy myself a birthday present and call it good. I am in love with them and I am so glad that I bought them!

Now, besides the material things that my aging has brought me...I am thinking I need to write a list of all of the great things I want to do while I'm in my 20s. It feels like of weird to say that...I'm in my 20s. Man, it's crazy how time flies...

In the past few months, I have learned a whole lot about my life and about  myself. Mostly I have learned to live in the moment. It doesn't do you any good to count down the days until the next thing. Enjoy where you're at and live your life to the fullest. Otherwise, you just spend each day waiting on tomorrow. 

Happy Birthday to me :)

How's Your Heart?

My friend that I met in basic knows basically everything there is to know about me that is important.  Even better, she knows what questions to ask. The one that means the most to me is, "how's your heart?"

Well, I want to tell you how my heart is...If you've been following me since I first began blogging, you know I've got this whole tragic unloved story in which I got left high and dry after making a huge life decision based on another person. It caused the walls of my perfect little world to crash around me and forced me to change my plans, my life, and my attitude. 

Sometimes, the sadness comes creeping into my heart and I can feel all the bad stuff trying to put a damper on the good, but who doesn't have those days every now and then? Lately, I've been doing my best to keep my head up and drive on. Honestly, it has been a lot easier than I anticipated. It's not that I forgot about the bad parts. How do you forget about your broken heart? You don't. But I've learned over  time, that the best way to be happy, is to be happy. So how's my heart? My heart is well. It feels better and better every day, and I think it's just going to keep on getting better, even when that bad stuff happens...at least I really hope so. 

Basically Awesome

It's time for another post about basic training! Yay!

I didn't love basic training exactly, but there were quite a few things about it that I really enjoyed. I already told you about my favorite training events, but there were quite a few other things about it that I really liked. 

Chow. 

I loooved chow. Well, I loved it when we ate in the chow hall (DFAC).  We would spend the week out on the range eating hot A's for breakfast which was a nightmare. Hot A's was basically chow hall food they put in mermites that you have to eat on the ground without ketchup or sugar. You spill and dirt gets in your food. Sometimes, our hands would be so cold that it wouldn't even be possible to eat...One time it was so windy, bread was flying all over the place. You can bet your bottom dollar that I still ate it... Needless to say, when we got to sit in the chow hall and have our ten minutes to eat, I was pleased as punch. Of course, anything was better than Jimmy Deans, but after you got used to eating this

 It was pretty dang nice to eat something that didn't come prepackaged. And believe it or not, that picture is of one of the better tasting ones!

My Battle Buddy. 

Ignore the fact that my beret is for serious...ate up. I need to fix that thing...

Most of the time, I don't make fast friends.  I am not that lucky girl that meets someone and instantly clicks with them. Well, I was this time. My bunkmate in basic is someone who I will never forget and I hope that I always talk to her. We had some of the best talks while pulling a fireguard shift or sitting around waiting for our turn to go do something. She helped me through a lot of things while I was in basic whether she knows it or not. I was so lucky to have her and I hope that we are friends for the rest of our lives. 

Ignore the fact that my beret is for serious...ate up. I need to fix that thing...

Sunday

Oh Sunday was lovely. It was a chance to relax and go to church. Sometimes I almost forgot where I was on Sundays. We got to leave our weapons locked up. That was probably the very best thing about it. It was so nice to not have to take that thing to chow. We also got to eat chow in the DFAC for all three meals on Sundays. 

Honestly, basic really had a lot of upsides to it. By the time I was finished, I felt like I had a lot of really positive things to say about it. Sure it was as physically or mentally challenging as I expected it to be, but it was a good experience that I was lucky to have for certain. 

Sunday Social [Favorite Things Edition]

Ahhh! It's the Sunday Social! It has been so long since I have done this. I'm too excited right now!

If you want to join in, head on over to Neely's or Ashley's blogs to link up!

1. Four favorite things to do on the weekend.

Watch Netflix.

Chillax at the PX and eat some real food. 

See my bestie from Basic. 

Look at my civilian clothes and miss them...

2. Four favorite things about your best friend.

I love that I can talk to them about anything.

I can be completely honest with them. 

I never have to worry about them judging me. 

I can count on them to have my back when no one else does.  

3. Four things you'd do with $100,000.

.

Pay for my entire college education...

Buy a brand new car that will never break down on me. 

Save it (yeah I know, I'm kind of boring...)

Buy my family...most of a new house. 

4. Four favorite books you've read.

Harry Potter (don't judge  me...)

To Kill A Mockingbird

Of Mice and Men

Winnie The Pooh (again...don't judge me!)

5. Four favorite snack foods. 

oh good heavens...what would I give for snack foods. 

Beef Jerky

Sunflower Seeds

Tortilla Chips with Bean Dip

Licorice

6. Four things you must do daily

Brush my teeth (believe it or not...lots of people don't do this!)

Play my favorite songs. 

Sweep my room (it never stays clean!)

Look at my civilian clothes and miss them. (did I say that already?!)

Calling experienced bloggers!

I'm considering doing something crazy!

I am thinking about a blog make over. And not just a new look, but a completely new blog. A name change an everything. In fact, I might leave this blog up, and just start a whole new one altogether. I'm a little bit hesitant to do so though. I've already built such a great following with this blog and I'm not sure if I want to start from scratch. 

Although I know a whole lot more about blogging now and it wouldn't have to go through quite so many growing pains, I'm not sure if it's worth losing the following.

As experienced bloggers, what do you think? 

Should I just change my blog name and design, or start up a whole new blog entirely and start from square one again? What are the pros and cons of each? Help me!!

Imma Stressed Mess!

Please, blog, forgive me for this neglect.

On Saturday, I was put in a position of leadership: Platoon Guide. I am now responsible for 59 soldiers. 59 new soldiers who all think that they know everything and beyond. It is so very frustrating and it's taking up all of my free time. In fact, this is the first time I've gotten my lap top out since I was put in this position. Really, I should be folding my socks...I had my first opportunity in days yesterday to do laundry, but of course, I didn't have time to fold it.

On top of that, my wall locker is a disaster. I straightened it up over the weekend and it's a big old mess again! It's so hard to keep it neat when you only have enough time to toss your dirty PTs in the laundry bag, change, slick the hair, and run to formation. Being in a leadership position, I've been making a special effort to be extra early to formation...It's annoying and giving me far less time to do everything.

The food here is not nearly as good as it was in Ft. Sill, but I am allowed to have on of these Nutri-grain bars at a time in my room...They aren't really enough to hold me over until the next chow, but it's something. It more than I had in basic, that's for sure! I'm really growing to like these bars.

Unfortunately, this weekend I won't get the change to go and get some real food due to this little thing the Army likes to call, "mass punishment".  DEFAC all weekend :P

I don't know what it is about food and me, but my wold seems to revolve around chow time, so I think about food...all the time. It's only natural that it would appear in my first blog post in a century.

Well, It looks like it's about my bed time (2020...ha, never thought I'd see the day I would say that!) so, I'll leave you all with this.








I'm working really hard to look on the bright side. I've passed all of my tests with over 90% and I'm in the running for honor graduate. I'm working really hard and continually putting my best foot forward. Being the PG is very challenging and very rewarding at the same time. Hopefully it will get better with time, or maybe it will just give me a lot of experience on how to deal with people who want to do your job for you...